Dabangg 3 (2019)

STORY – 0
DIRECTOR – 0
ACTOR – 0
MUSIC – 0
CULT – 0

 

VERDICT – 0/5

 

 

PROS –
N/A

 

 
CONS –
1) This movie is gross even by Salman Khan’s standards. A Bollywood masala movie when too much masala is added.
2) A forced Chulbul Pandey origin plot.
3) Annoying dialogues, forgettable performances, and jarring soundtrack.

 

 

 

QUOTE –
“maarenge bhi hum aur bachayenge bhi hum … lekin tum na dekh paoge, yeh tumhari aatma dekhegi aur ghanta kuch nahi kar payegi”

Die Hart (mini-series)

STORY – 1
DIRECTOR – 1
ACTOR – 1
MUSIC – 0
CULT – 0

 

VERDICT – 3/5

 

 

PROS –
1) An action-packed comedic mockumentary where Kevin Hart is playing a fictional version of himself who’s done playing the comedic sidekick of the leading action stars and decides to become the leading man. For that, he is sent to get trained in an “action star school”.
2) All 10 episodes are less than 10-minutes long which is very refreshing and very revolutionary approach from Quibi.
3) A good ensemble of actors. Watching John Travolta in a fun role was the best thing.

 

 

CONS –
1) The viewers can smell the final plot twist from a mile.
2) It could’ve been released as a 90 minutes movie instead.

 

 

QUOTE –
Claude Van De Velde: Do you remember what Matt Damon was before he was Jason Bourne.
Kevin: Yes. He’d just won an Oscar.
Claude Van De Velde: Neither do I

Beverly Hills Cop (1984)

STORY – 1
DIRECTOR – 1
ACTOR – 1
MUSIC – 1
CULT – 1

 

VERDICT – 5/5

 

 
PROS –
1) A maverick Detroit cop travels to Beverly Hills to find the killers of his friend. A run-of-the-mill buddy-cop movie but done correctly.
2) Supporting cast including Judge Reinhold & John Ashton [as Det. Rosewood & Sgt. Taggart] provided the right balance.
3) An era-defining soundtrack including tracks like “Axel F” by Harold Faltermeyer, “Stir It Up” by Patti LaBelle.
4) Steven Berkoff as Victor Maitland, the obligatory European boss villain.

 
CONS –
N/A

 

 

QUOTE –
Axel Foley: Is this your car?
Jenny Summers: Oh, no. In Beverly Hills, we just take whichever car is closest.

Wheels on Meals (1984)

STORY – 1
DIRECTOR – 1
ACTOR – 1
MUSIC – 0
CULT – 0

 

VERDICT – 3/5

 
PROS –
1) A fun-filled action-comedy shot in scenic Barcelona. Two food-truck operators entangled between a gang and an imbecile private investigator.
2) Lola Forner as Sylvia is a femme fatale.
3) Final battle: Jackie Chan vs Benny Urquidez.

 

CONS –
N/A

 

 

QUOTE –
Moby: My condition is that I accept all your conditions.

Spenser Confidential (2020)

STORY – 0
DIRECTOR – 1
ACTOR – 1
MUSIC – 0
CULT – 0

VERDICT – 2/5

 
PROS –
1) One time watch Sunday afternoon action movie with a possibility of a sequel.
2) The team of Spenser-Hawk is like a modern version Sherlock-Watson duo on steroid.

 
CONS –
1) A half-baked effort from Peter Berg.
2) Alan Arkin wasted.

 
QUOTE –
The FBI does not solve crime, they manage them. They play some big abstract game, trying to trade-up for some vague masterplan, a big fish, which they never do.

Shaft (2019)

STORY – 0
DIRECTOR – 1
ACTOR – 1
MUSIC – 0
CULT – 0

 

VERDICT – 2/5

 
PROS –
1) Good ol’ fun-action watch with all juicy dialogues from Samuel L. Jackson enough to burn the entire snowflakes generation. No doubt the movie got better audiences ratings on Rotten Tomatoes.

 
CONS –
1) Tediously formulaic plot.

 
QUOTE –
John Shaft II: I’m an equal-opportunity ass-whooper!

Mard Ko Dard Nahin Hota (2019)

STORY – 0
DIRECTOR – 1
ACTOR – 1
MUSIC – 1
CULT – 0

VERDICT – 3/5

 
PROS –
1) “Nakhrewali” action scene
2) Experimental music
3) Fresh slow-motion action scenes
4) The entire personality cult of Karate Mani

 

CONS –
1) Too much time wasted in built up.
2) Abhimanyu Dassani as Surya: expressionless actor
3) Vasan Bala tried making a cult movie on purpose.

 

QUOTE –
“har mind-blowing life ke pichhe kuch bahut burey decisions hotey hain”

The Spy Who Dumped Me (2018)

STORY – 0
DIRECTOR – 0
ACTOR – 0
MUSIC – 0
CULT – 0

Verdict – 0/5

 

Pros –
1) Tess post-script monologue is a well-written piece. Sadly, this character neither got a proper execution nor screentime.
2) Final Trapeze fight.

 

Cons –
1) Both lead actors are unfunny. Also, the jokes are without punchlines. The only funny character in this 117 minutes ordeal was the obese Finnish backpacker.
2) The movie just copied the Jude Law plot-twist from Spy (2015).
3) Ivanna Sakhno as Nadedja – token European weirdo villain.

 

Quote –
Audrey: How do you change gear?
Morgan: What’s a gear?

Kingsman: The Golden Circle (2017)

STORY – 0
DIRECTOR – 1
ACTOR – 1
MUSIC – 1
CULT – 0

Verdict – 3/5

Pros –
1) Introduction of Statesman: American cousins of Kingsman
2) Supporting Cast: Jeff Bridges, Pedro Pascal
3) Elton John’s extended cameo – Saturday Night’s Alright for Fighting
4) Some good action sequences

 

Cons –
1) Similar story to its prequel – A insane villain trying to take over the world.

 

Quote –
President of the United States: Let the junkie scum go down in flames!

Black Dynamite (2009)

STORY – 1
DIRECTOR – 1
ACTOR – 1
MUSIC – 0
CULT – 1

 

VERDICT – 4/5

 

PROS –
1) The “Code Kansas” decoding scene – the best part of the movie.
2) Funny names – Cream Corn, Tasty Freeze, Gunsmoke, Bullhorn, etc.
3) Kung-Fu Treachery!
4) Not just a spoof of the blaxploitation films, it was a lot like the grind-house experiments done by Tarantino and Rodriguez.

 

CONS –
N/A

 

 

QUOTE –
Black Dynamite: Your knowledge of scientific biological transmogrification is only outmatched by your zest for kung-fu treachery!